Monday, July 30, 2012

Being a Mom is hard.

Can I get an Amen!?

And I've only been one for 6 and a half months.

Being a mom is a lot harder than I thought it would be. It requires that I put myself - along with all my desires and wants and even needs - aside in order to care for someone else.  If it were up to me, I would probably sit on the couch browsing the web 80% of the time - and gorging myself on brownies and cookies and SO MANY SWEETS for the other 20% of the time.

As a parent, but especially as a mother, you can't be focused on yourself. If you put yourself first, not only will your ears bleed from a tiny person screaming at you until his needs are met, but you'll also have a hard time establishing trust with the little guy. He won't trust you because he doesn't know if he can depend on you to get him what he needs in a timely manner and take care of him.

For instance, many times I have had to eat dinner an hour or even two hours after I would have liked to, because Asher needs to be fed first, and then he is tired and fighting sleep, and then once I put him down and start to walk away, he wakes up and cries for me some more. I have had to leave gatherings much earlier than I wanted to because Asher was tired. When hosting company at my own home, I have had to excuse myself to go and take care of the baby.

It is so frustrating at times, and I think that is because motherhood - especially the putting others first part - is the very opposite of what my selfish flesh desires. I want to do what I want to do, when I want to do it. But motherhood is putting myself aside for a time. It is being loving and gentle when I feel like screaming and exploding.

I think this sacrifice of self is a big reason for the backlash against motherhood. The abortion culture fights against motherhood, against parenthood, against children because people are selfish and want to live their own lives and not have to be responsible for someone else.

However, doesn't anything that is good and worthy require sacrifices? The Olympics are going on now. Don't you think that those professional athletes worked relentlessly, making many sacrifices of time, money, relationships, etc? I am sure that countless times, many of those athletes had to leave a gathering of friends early because they had to be well rested for their training at 5am, or had to cancel a date because an opportunity came up to compete against a higher-ranked athlete and they needed the experience.

Was it difficult for them to make those sacrifices? No doubt. But they made them, and why? Because they considered their goal worth the cost of the sacrifices.

As a mom, I consider my goal - raising my son (and future children) in a way that leads him to love and serve God - worthy of the cost, and any sacrifices required. It's not easy. I don't always love every minute of it. But every minute of it is worth it.

Asher is not the source of purpose and meaning in my life: following God is. Loving and caring for Asher and raising him and all of his future brothers and sisters for God's glory is an outpouring of my love for God. That also is difficult for this selfish heart of mine, but that also is worth it.

Colossians 3:23-24 "Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ."

Linked to Women Living Well Wednesday and Works For Me Wednesday


  1. So true, and so good to read after being up since about 3:45 with my 7 month old! :) I need to be reminded of this every day--it's hard to remember when you're in the middle of the thousandth walk up and down the hallway!

    1. It is hard to remember in those hard times, but that's when we need it most! Thanks for reading!

  2. Amen! It is hard and gets harder. But it is worth it. Focusing on the goal and who we do this for keeps us going. You have an adorable baby!

  3. Really good article. It is hard. It's the hardest thing I have every done. However, the things that are worth it are hard, and keeping the end goals in mind definitely help. Welcome to the journey. Jodi @

    1. That's right. Thanks! I like your blog, it's got lots of useful info and tips!

  4. it wrong above